The Radio in my Head

On Friday night Broadway boy Aaron Tveit performed is first concert at 54 Below. He has cleverly named his show 'The Radio in my Head" and all the songs he performed hold a special place in his heart, they tell his story of performing and it got me thinking.

 As Musical Theatre performers our job is to tell a story through song, after all that is why we prefer it over straight plays. The addition of music heightens the emotion for us. So why not tell our own stories through music? Aaron's genius inspired me to make my own playlist documenting my story.

1. Good Morning Baltimore- Hairspray.

-This was my first taste of Broadway. At 18 years old on a school trip I saw my first Broadway musical and got to do a workshop with some of the cast. It was at that moment I knew New York was the place I would one day call home.

2. Born to Try- Delta Goodrem

-At 11 years old there was a character on the TV show Neighbours that spoke to me more than anyone ever had. She was called Nina Tucker, a shy girl who came alive when she sang. Two years later the actress released her first single, Born to Try and I knew I wanted to perform for a living.

3. Over the Rainbow- The Wizard of Oz

- This was my first show in high school. I played Glinda but desperately wanted to sing this song! It was my first taste of being in a musical and I was in love.

4. Idaho- Nerina Pallot

- When I was 19 I was lucky enough to record with a professional sound engineer and this was the song. I learnt it in less than an hour and since then it has been one of my favourite songs to both sing and listen to.

5. I Miss the Mountains- Next to Normal

- For a long time I avoided this show, the issues in it and this song in particular hit too close to home and upset me far too much. When I was finally in a good enough place to listen to it I was completely blown away. Since then Diana has become a role I would love to play one day.

6. On My Own- Les Miserables

- The Musical and role that started it all. (See last weeks post for a full length ramble on how much this musical means to me! I shan't bore you again.)

7. Dark Blue- Jack's Mannequin

- I adored this band in high school but I hit a creative slump in university and stumbled across the front mans documentary. It inspired me just as much as Delta had ten years earlier and they have done ever since. So much so that I got their symbol tattooed onto me!

8. Out Tonight- Rent

- It took me a long time to get into this musical. My friends would always play me the songs and while I enjoyed them I was far too innocent to really appreciate it. Now I am obsessed! While I'm still quite timid whenever this song comes on I let loose and Mimi has become another dream role.

9. Memory- Cats

- This was the first song I ever performed. It was my first year at high school, I was 11 years old and my music teacher asked me to sing it for the class. She saw something in me that day and all through high school continued to push me to my fullest.

10. With You- Ghost

- I wrote about this musical for my final year dissertation and fell head over heels with the music. This song in particular is just so stunningly beautiful and surprise, surprise. Molly is another dream role!

11. Candyman- Christina Aguilera

- This is my go to karaoke song! I heard this album in my first year of university and became obsessed with all things vintage, as well as the different ways I could use my voice. Up until then it had been all musical theatre or Delta Goodrem. Now I started learning how to growl and riff and really expand what I could do.

12. No Good Deed- Wicked

- During my second year of university I was feeling unfullfilled. I was doing a Drama degree and missed singing. My parents completely supported me when I applied to do a short course in Musical Theatre and this was the first song I performed with them. I barely remember the performance because for the first time I got so into character I didn't think and afterwards I was hit with such a high I just knew I was doing the right thing.

Encore. They Just Keep Moving the Line- Smash

-This show gives me my weekly dose of Broadway and this song in particular really hit home. I get a degree, but that's not good enough I need to keep going. I get experience but there's always something else to complete. They just keep moving that dammed line!

So there we go! If I were to perform my own show, that would be the set list. It may be interesting to come back to it when I'm 30 and see what songs I would choose then. What would be added and what would be taken away?

Wish me luck, the same to you.

Annabelle

xoxo

The Starving Artist

It is 8pm on a Friday night and once again I am sat inside watching bad movies and eating my body weight in chocolate. While I have always admittedly been a bit of a loner this constant house arrest isn't due to lack of friends, more a lack of money.

 There's this romantic notion that surrounds the starving artist. They suffer for their art but ultimately grow from the experience.

 All I'm growing is the desire for a money tree.

 Not only am I not acting, I'm just not working, what job can you get with a drama degree? None apparently! The acting jobs want people from drama schools and the 'real' jobs want people with 'real' degrees leaving little old me back at my parents and finding free ways to entertain myself.

 So I thought I'd share a few things I've come up with for my fellow starving artists!

- Watch through your DVD library: Seeing as this is only a part of my collection I think this will keep me occupied for a while! 

-Spring Clean: 'Tis the season and all that. I'm actually really proud with the way my room has turned out and I have boxes full of things to sell, which in turn will make me money.

- Go for a walk somewhere new: It's free and you get to explore and learn something. If you take your camera along you can get some awsome shots too!

-Improve yourself: Get out the old singing books, go on youtube and teach yourself dancing, pull out the Stanislavski! You won't have this much down time for long so use it to better yourself and in turn your career.

-Get online!: Blog, make videos, find a way to be creative so the artist side of you isn't starving too. Even if no one reads it, you get it out and get to think!

In the meantime I've started a couple of savings projects to help with the lack of money issue. 

- The Spending Fast: This is where you only spend on needs, such as rent, bills, food, and nothing else. Everything else you make goes into savings. These hardcore girls have done it for a whole year, I'm attempting three months and then I'll go from there. Who knows, maybe I'll manage a year too?

- The 52 Week Challenge: This is something I'm going to be lenient with, unlike the spending fast, the idea is you put £1 in week one, £2 for week two, £3 for week three and so on. By the end of the year you'll have around £1,700 saved and it won't have been too much trouble.

If you have any ideas please let me know and I hope these inspire you in some way!

Wish me luck, the same to you.

Annabelle

xoxo

The Audition

 After the harsh "That's all we need," yesterday was a nice surprise. To begin with the people holding the audition were incredibly lovely. (I'm not saying the others were horrible, I just had about 10 seconds with them and that's not enough time to tell!) 

 As you know the day started with a dance audition. We were taught a routine from Newsies. For those of you familiar with the show can you imagine my intense fear when I hear that name come up, especially as a none dancer! For those of you unfamiliar here is a video to show you the standard these guys are at...

(The insanely incredible dancing starts around 2 minutes in.)

 At that point I thought, might as well give up, you're dead meat! Oh boy was I wrong. For starters the way the guy ran the audition was extremely relaxed, he'd make jokes (Including A Chorus Line "Again... Again....Again..." thrown in for good measure!) If you were stuck he would run over it with you without being snotty about it and when it came to actually performing it if you were very stuck he got up and ran it with you. 

 I can say very proudly that A) My group managed to perform the dance unsupervised... whether I got all the moves or not is another thing, but I did it with a smile on my face, and B) I didn't fall on my behind! That for me is a huge success compared to my last dance audition.

 Then came the singing... this was my time to shine! I sang No Good Deed from Wicked and am so happy with the way it went. If you add in the laughs I had with some girls I met the day was actually one I will look back on fondly, even if I don't get a part. And this is how I will look back at every audition from now on, by listing the things I achieved and learnt from the day rather than focusing on the bad. So here goes...

- I learnt a very hard dance combination for me, and managed to overcome my worries and perform it with a smile and a character.

- I remained standing through the entire thing!

- I met some wonderful people who pulled me out of my shell enough to dance in a very crowded street and sing in a pub, two things the old Annabelle would never dream of doing. (Well, maybe after a couple of pints...)

- I belted my little heart out managing to put character into my song, despite my nerves.

 All in all I'm happy! Now I need to wait out the week to see if I get a part or not.

Wish me luck, the same to you!

Annabelle

xoxo

Dancing Through Life

 On Sunday I have another audition, it's for regional theatre this time around and that makes it no less scary than any other in my mind! In fact it's even more terrifying as it starts with a dance audition.

 Now I'm okay at dancing if you give me time to pick up the steps, I've had some training and figured out my problem is confidence. (I know, join the club!) That doesn't stop me sabotaging myself every time a dance audition comes around.

 Let me give you an example. I had an audition for Into the Woods, having never heard the music before (remember my thing of not researching shows until I've seen them...) that was a big enough issue, thank you very much Mr. Sondheim. On top of that I had to learn a dance routine... I picked up the steps easy enough and while rehearsing as a group I felt pretty confident, hidden, able to watch the choreographer.

 Then it comes time for the groups of four to perform it and when one of the turns comes up I fall flat on my backside. There was no way to hide this, I was sprawled on the floor very ungracefully scrambling to get back up and complete the rest of the combination head down in shame.

 It's safe to say I didn't get the part... or any part for that matter!

[Source]

 So how do I stop myself doing the same on Sunday? If you have any ideas please let me know because I sure don't. I'm naturally a very nervous person, something happens when I sing that takes it all away, the same can't be said for dancing.

 It's that thing that when I sing I stop over thinking, everything becomes very simple and life is one big happy pie full of rainbows and fluffy bunnies. (I'm not sure either.) When I dance in front of people I other think. Should my arm be here or 3.5 inches up to the very slight left? Yeah my perfectionist comes out in full form and as someone who falls over their own feet while walking, trying to manoeuvre while thinking about if your head should be tilted to the left looking to the right while your arms flip to both sides is near impossible.

 On the plus side there are plenty of female parts that require no dancing, Eponine. Elphaba, she's actually meant to be awful! Natalie in Next to Normal, Molly in Ghost, any of the girls in Hair. Just flail and you're a hippy!

Wish me luck, the same to you!

Annabelle

xoxo

That's all we need.

"Gimme, gimme that thing called love!" The last note rings around the rehearsal/ dance/ whatever room. Nailed it, and I never thought with my nerves and how dry my throat felt just seconds ago that I'd be able to hit it and sustain it but things went better than expected.

 "That's all we need. Thank you for coming." The panel smiles and I collect my sheet music from the pianist who gives me a sympathetic smile, walking out the room my only thoughts are "Don't cry, don't cry, don't bloody cry!"

 That's all you get, you spend hours waiting around working yourself up, your heart apparently deciding it wants to become a gymnast as it does backflips in your chest and your stomach ties itself into such a tight knot that food is not an option, no matter how long you're there for. Then after weeks of preparation your sixteen bars are through and "That's all we need..." It's brutal, and frustrating!

 What did I do wrong? Why didn't they like me? You'll just never know.

 Auditioning isn't fun, no matter how you try and spin it into a performance it's terrifying! The only moment of calm you get is when you start to sing and everything just melts away and you think, "yes, this is why I'm putting myself through this." To sing, to act, to do the thing I love the most. 

 I've known all along that wanting to become a performer would be so much harder than I could imagine. After every rejection I'd have to pick myself up again and prepare for the next one. I've come up with my own method of dealing with it. I allow myself to mope about for a couple of hours/ a day, depending on how much I wanted the job or what I'm doing with the rest of my day, then let it go. 

 I can't just let it go straight away. a) I'm not wired in that way and b) It's hard when you really care about something! But allowing myself time to be sad means that when it comes to moving on and picking myself up again it's a lot easier!

 So that's where I am. Picking up the pieces of loosing the role of Tracy Turnblad (I really wanted this one) and trying to move onto the next opportunity, whatever that is.

Wish me luck, the same to you!

Annabelle

xoxo